One of the unexpected events of my bone marrow transplant 14 months ago has been tooth decay and cavities. The chemistry of my body has been changed and I am immune-compromised, which includes the enzymes in my mouth that usually protect teeth. I have had 9 cavities filled in the past 3 weeks. Ugh. After my last filling, I invested in a new electric toothbrush that I use at least 2 times a day. There is a blinking light that designates 30-second intervals and the recommended goal is to brush for approximately 2 minutes. Consistent with my personality where more is better, I prefer to go to 5 minutes, just to ensure I remove all the sugars that cause cavities.
And now, I have an even newer hygiene routine that I practice several times a day: handwashing to prevent the Covid-19 virus. I stand over the sink and sing out loud 'Happy birthday to me, happy birthday to you, happy birthday, happy birthday, happy birthday. amen.' Then I repeat the song and that is my signal to rinse and dry off.
You see, I am in the ultra-high-risk group with cancer and transplant history. I am social distancing even from my own children and wife. It is more than difficult for Kate and me, but necessary. As hard as my family and I have worked to stay alive these past years, I think it would be irresponsible if I was in any way casual regarding keeping the coronavirus out of my system.
So, now in light of the national guidance to self-quarantine, I have a lot of time to think about what’s going on in the world: earthquakes in Utah, Texas, San Francisco and Croatia, floods in Houston, tornadoes in Nashville, locusts plague wiping out vegetation in parts of Africa, rising sea levels, major fires burning thousands of acres in California and Australia. And all of this just in the past year and recent days.
What is going on? My attitude is to look skyward and ask "Lord?” and then pause to let God impress on my spirit. I break the silence by saying, “You got this, right?” and I sense His nod and slight smile. It is affirming for me to recognize that I am not actually in control and He is.
While I wonder what is going on worldwide, I am wary of the end of the world prophecy, but it crosses my mind. I do remind myself to imagine what my grandparents thought in the 1940s when the entire world was at war and the outcome was in the balance. What could they do from their farms and coal mines in small ethnic towns in upstate Pennsylvania? Worry? Protest? Go off the grid?
What they did was pray.
My wife has a sign in our bedroom that she points to at least once a month that reads ‘GIVE IT TO GOD AND GO TO SLEEP.’ I like that. She also tells me, “Sweetie, you can pray, or you can worry, but you can't do both!” So, taking both my grandparents’ and my wife’s lead, I lean into prayer for everything.
Just last week I was washing my hands and singing the birthday song two times through and it felt kind of silly. Without purposeful thought, I suddenly changed my tune and I found myself saying, "our Father, who art in heaven...”
I went through the entire Lord’s Prayer over the sink, saying it kind of fast from rote memory as I learned as a 6-year-old in Sunday school at St John Bosco in Warminster, PA. But rushing through the words troubled me, seeming to be disrespectful somehow, just using the prayer merely as a timer to ensure I wash my hands for the minimum amount of time. So, I started over and said the Our Father as the reverential prayer it is intended to be. It definitely took me more than 30 seconds.
When I was finished, my hands were more than clean and my mind and spirit were refreshed and postured appropriately. I felt that I was humbly requesting blessing, protection, and providence from the Almighty over me, my family, our state, our country and the world in the face of great uncertainty, suffering and death. And it has given me a degree of peace every day since.
May I invite you to try it too? I don’t think you will regret it.
Stay safe and healthy.
Amen and Amen